( it's not a question that he hasn't heard himself--the echoes of it, deep in his head, of someone begging him not to erase them, of knowing that there's little else beyond whatever it is he has for himself now. it's funny, really, that he might consider himself a coward in some respects: he's not afraid of putting himself out in front of his teammates for an enemy, but the thought of cursing himself by his own hand is laughably terrifying. he just can't bring himself to do it.
the wine tastes different, on a tongue that's shared some strange secret--he swallows and hopes it will go down all the same. his companion looks like she could use one herself, though he doesn't want to offer, wondering if there's a reason she's sitting here listening to him. maybe she's lonely, too. )
I can't bring myself to do it, and if the hands of others can't do it for me either, I'm a little trapped.
( a thought then, sharp-- ) Do you regret it? Being alive.
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2020-08-23 10:53 am (UTC)( it's not a question that he hasn't heard himself--the echoes of it, deep in his head, of someone begging him not to erase them, of knowing that there's little else beyond whatever it is he has for himself now. it's funny, really, that he might consider himself a coward in some respects: he's not afraid of putting himself out in front of his teammates for an enemy, but the thought of cursing himself by his own hand is laughably terrifying. he just can't bring himself to do it.
the wine tastes different, on a tongue that's shared some strange secret--he swallows and hopes it will go down all the same. his companion looks like she could use one herself, though he doesn't want to offer, wondering if there's a reason she's sitting here listening to him. maybe she's lonely, too. )
I can't bring myself to do it, and if the hands of others can't do it for me either, I'm a little trapped.
( a thought then, sharp-- ) Do you regret it? Being alive.